Four years ago today was one of the happiest in my life. I know, that is exceptionally cliché but it is also intensely accurate. I wasn’t blissful, romantic, or naïve but I was happy. Almost nothing went right on our wedding day. We kept having to change dates because of his job (our first real “line-life” learning curve) so any real planning such as invitations or bridal showers went out the window. I felt like my dress was too short, my hair too puffy, and my makeup too bold. It was stifling hot, I got sick after lunch (in front of everyone outside of the restaurant), and the whole situation just felt awkward as it was not the wedding that we actually wanted but instead an attempt at making family happy. The thing was though, I believed then as I do now, that it shouldn’t be about the wedding. The focus should be on the marriage and the union of two people (with God as their third) who wouldn’t want to live life without each other.
“Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.” -Ecclesiastes 4:12
For me, our wedding is a blur of embarrassing memories. I loved the time with the people and am thankful that we had so many to share the occasion with but I would rather not think about it most days. Our marriage has teemed with a roller coaster of emotions and I cannot begin to capture them all. The pride of my husband finding his passion was met with the heartache of watching him live on the road. The bliss of bringing our babies home was dulled while raising them alone. Even the victory of becoming full-time travelers had it’s own woes as we left behind our friends, family, and our first home. It is true. Marriage can be hard work. We have faced a lot for such a young couple but the joyous moments see us through. The thing is, we have done it together with God. He is not only by our side but He guides us to where we are meant to go. We pray for Him to show us His way and though we are not always patient, in the end, we understand the periods of waiting. We look back at our trials or triumphs and can see what was learned. The tidbits of why He helped my husband choose the paths he did shine through. Without Him, we would surely not be.
So, for those of you who are still waiting on your big day to arrive, try not to focus on the glamour, the décor, or the guest list. Instead, pray about what you want from your union with this person you love so dearly. As his dreams become your dreams are you both willing to chase them down? As a wife, will you be willing to follow and as a husband, will you be willing to lead? Ask God what He expects of you as a couple as you take on the world together. Make Him an integral part of not only your nuptials but your lives. On a day in the not so distant future, your wedding will fade to a collection of old photographs and stories brimming with youth. Your marriage though, well, I’ll be praying that lasts forever.